Through ironically colourful colourblind eyes....

4/22/2005 11:07:00 PM

Fired up

Something happened tonight that has spurred me to action. I will admit, sometimes I get lazy about life. Sometimes I need soemthing to sort of 'jumpstart'me to be an active participant as opposed to a spectator. Well, just a couple minutes I was 'jumpstarted' once again. I wont go into what did it, thats for my private blog. I will, however, go into what effect it has had on me.At first it pissed me off no end. After I had let off some steam I really began to think about the things that are either missing in my life, or things that are left to be fully explored. I began to think about things I had made plans to do, to learn, to better myself as a person. And I started thinking what the hell is stopping me from getting started on these things. School is now done (for the time being). I have absolutely no reason for not getting started. I have just been a lazy ass, thats all. But now I feel fired up. Lets hope the fire lasts....

4/21/2005 08:29:00 AM

The road ahead... shrouded in mist, a heavy fog all around. I cant see but a few months ahead at any one time. I am now at the ripe young age age of 25 (I say young because well I am, but I say ripe cause I figure its around this time one's life is supposed to start, the time you make decisions that will shape how the rest of your life should look) and still I have not a clue as to what I want to do with my life. The only reason I did Computer Science at UWI was because at the time it was 'the future', and a sure fire guarantee. I didnt actually start liking it until in my final year. Ive been in the industry for what, 3 years now? And its ok, not great but its ok. I dont hate my job, but I dont love it either. Its not my passion if you know what I mean.
I am very close towards the end of my Executive MBA degree in Business. Why did I decide to do it? Because 2 years ago I was feeling this exact way and wanted to do something with my life, something that showed some sort of progression. I had no knowledge whatsoever of the Business world (the extent of my knowledge was CXC Accounts), and by this time the Computer Industry was pretty much saturated as far as I was concerned. If people are able to learn everything needed to know about Networking, Programming etc. from downloading a few tutorials from the net, and can get jobs in consulting in hardware maintenace, networking, etc. all without so much of a diploma, whats the point in going further to do Masters? None. My best option was to go for a different field. Mi nah lie, the MBA did rough, cause is a Executive Masters they dont start from scratch, they assume you have some knowledge of certain things from before. I can now say I know a whole lot more about the Business world...but again, nothing I am particularly passionate about. And I hate the idea of managing people, the only time I would consider being a manager of anything is if its my own company. Anyhow it wasnt a waste, any knowledge is good knowledge.
So what do I like to do then? Well, I love music. Funnily enough, I never started listening to music til the early 90s when I got cable. So nuff 80s tunes I dont know. Around the same time my father got me this very small keyboard, and a friend taught me the song "right there waiting for you". Easy enough to learn, nothing that got me addicted. Then in 4th form at high school I decided to join the choir cause I needed some extracurricular activity on my report. The rest is history. By the time I left high school 4 years later I was capable of playing grade 3 and grade 4 pieces. There was one particular difficult piece I could play just about as well as the choir's pianist...maybe even a little better. Because I couldnt read notes to save my life but I loved playing I would sit at the piano for hours making up stuff, and ppl would ask me to teach them. In that time I also took up guitar, and a friend taking guitar lessons at Edna Manley was asking ME to show HIM some stuff.
So where am I with music now? Nowhere. After I left high school the passion faded. Well, the passion for playing that is. I still like to compose stuff, but I havent done it in so long I wonder if I still can....
I also have a growing love for photography. I havent explored it fully yet tho. That will be my plan for the next year or so....
How can I use these talents to make money? I dunno, I dont even know my place in either of them. Like I said, the road ahead is covered in a heavy fog. I wonder how long this fog will take to lift.....

4/20/2005 06:01:00 PM


Ah started out ok, went downhill in the afternoon. I cant even straighen out the thoughts going through my head right about now. Hell, I dont even know if I want to talk, or even think about it.
I know I know, not a very good start right? Dont worry it will get better, I promise.

4/20/2005 09:43:00 AM

Ok here it is

Ive come to realize how popular this blogging thing has become, seems like every other person I know has got a blog. I actually started one in January, that one has lots of ranting on it though, and personal stuff that reveals all insecurities, problems and flaws in my psyche that most people probably dont know about....and I'd like to keep it that way :-) So that one I wont share the URL (sorry) its not password protected tho so you might just happen onto it by accident. If you think you found it jus whisper it to me :D

Anyway, this will be the public one, with more public thoughts/rantings/ideas/etc/ get the idea.